Wat we call love? Am I in Love? How do we know its love....... Within this year I already fall in love with 2 guys. It’s so funny. All were a puppy love. A short term relationship..... 2 ke? I think with 3 guys hmmmmmm. Was a malay(M) guy a foreigner(F) and last one was an Indian (I) guy. kekekekkeke... what a taste kan. I know.
With M, I did try I accept him as what he is. But he can’t accept my family. He is the one who marrying me not my mum or my dad. I know my parents can accept him. Lagilah dea Jawa. My parents will love to have him. But coz of rendah diri he tarik diri. I dont mind what kind of job his having now. As long he work hard to improve himself. And he's not prepared to settle down. hmmmmm so I had to back off. What is a relationship if it just a relationship with out an ending. I do need to think about my future too.
And with F its so complicated. He is a very nice person. But he will not convert to Islam. And I don’t want him to convert just because of me. It’s not fair. Yes love is love but my love to Allah bigger than my love to him. Although I’m not that so alim but I love my creator, Allah. And I know his love for his creator is bigger then he love me. It’s fair for us not to be together. So abis lah.
With I, its funny he willingly to conver but there alot of problem. huh... tak tau lah...... pelik macam-macam masalah. So, he think he can’t continue with us, we break off and become a good friend. M, F and I are still around. We are good friend to each other. I think we are better friend then lover. hmmmmmm.
Lately I met some one. A foreigner too. I wish a Malay guy that approach me. Tapi tak de. His is a converted Muslim. Memenuhi my syarat. Tinggi, kaya, hansome and alim. kui kui kui. Hansome tu idak lah. Tapi sedap lah mata memandang. The best thing he is a muslim. And a very nice guy. hmmmm cair makcik. At first i was not so interested. Sebab i know my parents mesti stress lagi. Dah lah my 2nd sister married with a spain guy and fly there and now me. Kesian kan. Lagi pun i was a bit scared to fall in love agin. Almaklumlah its a painful process. But the way he is, make me melt. He is alim, the way dea cakap lah. It all Allah wills. All things happen because Allah wan it to happen. Another thing, although its a long distance relationship, he call me nearly everyday. And he told his friends about me. And I even chat with his fren.fuh... he is a very nice guy. If he the one for me, i will accept it. I love him…. He just called me. We talked more then an hour. UK to Malaysia… That cost a lot kan. (Saynag nye kat dea… hmmmmmm)
BUT
Have I done wrong..... I told my mum about him. As usual lah... mesti kureng berkenan. She said " When u were with Hakem, I know it wont go right. Tak akan menjadi", " I dont wan u wasting ur time and money. Find a Malay guy. Tak kisah lah as long he is nice and alim"fuh.... how to answer that..... All thing happen because of a reasons. Life is short mak. I wan to try everything. Kalau kite tak cuba kita tak tau. Yes I admit i have gamble with my life. With my love life with my career but atleast i try kan. I can say "Been There, Done That". I know she worried abt me. Im the only daughter yang tak settle settle lagi. kkkekekek I do remember my dad said masa raya hari tu " Ina, semua benda yang tak baik yang ko buat akan bapak tanggung" I do undertstand that. But i can think and i already akil balikh. Wat i know kan, Segala dosa yg my dad tanggung is bende yang dea tak ajar or nasihat, but i know wat right and wrong so i do tanggun g my own sins kan? I hope so.
Ok back to the story, my mum cam tak berkenan she asked me to just be his fren. Wat she most worry is she worried if i settle down there and bcome servant. Jadi kuli kene dera.hmmmm tak tau lah emak nye. Ina memang tak tau. Itu semua di tangan Tuhan. I do my best and hope i get the best. And she advice me when i go to umrah later do lots of dua there. Now also she ask me to dua. I am doing it after each prayer. Yes if he for me, he will be. No worry. Know wat now i felt so guilty that i told her that i am in a relationship. hmmmmmm.... takut tak jadi lagi kang she will said" kan mak dah kata"....
With M, I did try I accept him as what he is. But he can’t accept my family. He is the one who marrying me not my mum or my dad. I know my parents can accept him. Lagilah dea Jawa. My parents will love to have him. But coz of rendah diri he tarik diri. I dont mind what kind of job his having now. As long he work hard to improve himself. And he's not prepared to settle down. hmmmmm so I had to back off. What is a relationship if it just a relationship with out an ending. I do need to think about my future too.
And with F its so complicated. He is a very nice person. But he will not convert to Islam. And I don’t want him to convert just because of me. It’s not fair. Yes love is love but my love to Allah bigger than my love to him. Although I’m not that so alim but I love my creator, Allah. And I know his love for his creator is bigger then he love me. It’s fair for us not to be together. So abis lah.
With I, its funny he willingly to conver but there alot of problem. huh... tak tau lah...... pelik macam-macam masalah. So, he think he can’t continue with us, we break off and become a good friend. M, F and I are still around. We are good friend to each other. I think we are better friend then lover. hmmmmmm.
Lately I met some one. A foreigner too. I wish a Malay guy that approach me. Tapi tak de. His is a converted Muslim. Memenuhi my syarat. Tinggi, kaya, hansome and alim. kui kui kui. Hansome tu idak lah. Tapi sedap lah mata memandang. The best thing he is a muslim. And a very nice guy. hmmmm cair makcik. At first i was not so interested. Sebab i know my parents mesti stress lagi. Dah lah my 2nd sister married with a spain guy and fly there and now me. Kesian kan. Lagi pun i was a bit scared to fall in love agin. Almaklumlah its a painful process. But the way he is, make me melt. He is alim, the way dea cakap lah. It all Allah wills. All things happen because Allah wan it to happen. Another thing, although its a long distance relationship, he call me nearly everyday. And he told his friends about me. And I even chat with his fren.fuh... he is a very nice guy. If he the one for me, i will accept it. I love him…. He just called me. We talked more then an hour. UK to Malaysia… That cost a lot kan. (Saynag nye kat dea… hmmmmmm)
BUT
Have I done wrong..... I told my mum about him. As usual lah... mesti kureng berkenan. She said " When u were with Hakem, I know it wont go right. Tak akan menjadi", " I dont wan u wasting ur time and money. Find a Malay guy. Tak kisah lah as long he is nice and alim"fuh.... how to answer that..... All thing happen because of a reasons. Life is short mak. I wan to try everything. Kalau kite tak cuba kita tak tau. Yes I admit i have gamble with my life. With my love life with my career but atleast i try kan. I can say "Been There, Done That". I know she worried abt me. Im the only daughter yang tak settle settle lagi. kkkekekek I do remember my dad said masa raya hari tu " Ina, semua benda yang tak baik yang ko buat akan bapak tanggung" I do undertstand that. But i can think and i already akil balikh. Wat i know kan, Segala dosa yg my dad tanggung is bende yang dea tak ajar or nasihat, but i know wat right and wrong so i do tanggun g my own sins kan? I hope so.
Ok back to the story, my mum cam tak berkenan she asked me to just be his fren. Wat she most worry is she worried if i settle down there and bcome servant. Jadi kuli kene dera.hmmmm tak tau lah emak nye. Ina memang tak tau. Itu semua di tangan Tuhan. I do my best and hope i get the best. And she advice me when i go to umrah later do lots of dua there. Now also she ask me to dua. I am doing it after each prayer. Yes if he for me, he will be. No worry. Know wat now i felt so guilty that i told her that i am in a relationship. hmmmmmm.... takut tak jadi lagi kang she will said" kan mak dah kata"....
5 comments:
sejak biler u ada yg I??? tak tau pun!
kekeek lawak kan. It just happen.... Tapi scarry lah Lil. I takut....
takpe.....like you said.. 'berani mesti boleh punya!"
live your life, not others...
that's all I wanna say...
if you are happy, everybody around you will be happy... believe me....
Thanks for visiting my blog pakcik nye :).
But sometimes you be more happy when you manage to make people around you happy kan....
Tapi yes u r correct.... if we happy semua orang pun happy kan ;)
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